"The voice of my disease is with me every day", she wrote. Once, it completely convinced me I should live off 300 calories a day, and at some point, it told me even that was too much. "As someone who struggles with a mental illness, my biggest challenge is that I don't always know which voice inside me is speaking", Bellisario wrote in the essay. It was hard to know which ones to listen to, and unfortunately for her health, she listened to the wrong voice. Her brain tells her ludicrous things that most people wouldn't even think was true.
Her husband, Suits star Patrick J. Adams, expressed that same support via Twitter today, posting a link to Bellisario's essay and calling her "the bravest and most lovely woman I've ever met".
Bellisario also revealed that her greatest source of strength through her struggles was from the loved ones surrounding her. "Writing, producing, and acting in [Feed] helped me get one more degree of separation from my disease in what I know will be a lifetime of work in recovery", she says.More news: Philippine lawmakers approve extending Mindanao martial law to end of year
Bellisario-who wrote and starred in the upcoming film, "Feed", in which she plays a teenager who is driven to an eating disorder after the death of her twin brother-ended her essay by detailing the hard path she went through to getting healthy.
Now the popular actress is coming forward to admit that the destructive voice is still in her head wreaking havoc, making her feel as if she is a disappointment or telling her, "You are not enough". I am practiced at ignoring it, for the most part, but it is still there, finding new ways to undermine me. Bellisario hopes that this movie will make a difference in someone's life. "It's not the exact events, but what I wanted to do with the film was get the audience to understand what it sounds like and what it feels like to be struggling with that illness", Bellisario said in an interview with Teen Vogue. In the past Troian stated that her disorder wasn't just based on the need to be skinny, but it was rather a way of having control of her body. I wanted to channel that voice into a story and out of myself.
"He was really supportive in the way that he was like, really watching me", Bellisario said.